Page 6 * Sunday, June 6, 2010
CANCER
Tips for Single African-American Women Coping with Breast Cancer
By Helen L. Coons, Ph.D and Julia Rovinsky, M.S. You already know the statistics - African American women in the United States are far more likely to be single than women in other ethnic groups. In fact, according to US Census data, approximately 45% of black women have never been married. Others are divorced or widowed. And African American women across the life span are also diagnosed with breast cancer. In fact, while black women have slightly lower rates of breast cancer compared to white women, they are more likely to be diagnosed with a more aggressive type of breast cancer, and have higher rates of death from the disease. But we rarely talk about what it is like for single or unpartnered women in any ethnic group to cope with cancer and its treatments compared to those who are married or are at least in committed relationships. So consider the following tips if you are facing the challenges of early or advanced breast cancer as a single woman. 1) Build your support community as early as possible. Breast cancer treatment options are complex and understanding all the information can be overwhelming. Ask a family member, friend or co-worker to go with you to appointments with your surgical, medical or radiation oncologist; plastic surgeon if you are having reconstruction; to the nutritionist; and to the genetic counselor. They can write down information, treatment recommendations, referrals, etc. If you are having a mastectomy, ask someone to stay with you for at least the first night and have others visit you in the hospital. It's important that you have someone there for support, to get you water and to be a good advocate for your care needs. If you need chemotherapy and/or radiation, ask someone to go with you as well. 2) When family or friends ask what they can do to help, don't hesitate to take them up on their offers. This is not a time to see if you can do everything yourself. Ask them to visit - even if briefly, bring over small healthy dinners, drop off a child at school, change your sheets, take you to the movies, etc. Remember, asking for what you need doesn't mean that you are weak - in fact it is sign of strength! 4) Talk with the hospital social worker if you are struggling with finances, food or transportation. Several agencies in the Philadelphia area provide support to women with cancer. Look into resources at your hospital and check in with the American Cancer Society, Living Beyond Breast Cancer, Linda Creed Breast Cancer Foundation, MANNA, Philadelphia Corporation for the Aging, etc. Consider attending a support group for women with breast cancer at your hospital, in your community, at the Wellness Community, etc. Also, programs offered by Women of Faith and Hope and Sisters Supporting Sisters are specifically for African American women with breast cancer. Talking with other women who really get what you are going through helps you feel less isolated and gives you another source of information and support. 5) Make sure you are taking time to take care of your self. It is essential during and after breast cancer treatment to improve your nutrition, exercise regularly, take your medications and keep up with visits to your health care providers as well as follow-up tests. 6) It is especially common for younger, single women to be concerned about body image, sexual health and fertility options after breast cancer treatment, although plenty of women of all ages have these concerns as well after surgery and chemotherapy. If are having difficulties with your body image or sexual satisfaction, ask your oncologist or gynecologist for a referral. If you start dating during or after breast cancer treatment, talk with friends about when and how to disclose your cancer history. Remember that your date may also have medical and other problems that may be hard to talk about. Also, breast cancer is not the only health issue that needs to be discussed - don't forget that it is crucial to talk about HIV/AIDS and other STD's before considering intimate sexual activity. 7) Take Care of Business: Whether you have early or advanced breast cancer or children or not, make sure that you complete a property will, name a health power of attorney and have a living will. While it can seem emotionally upsetting to complete these documents, it is essential that family or friends know what is important to you. Clearly, if you have dependent children, you will want to document custody arrangements if you are not able to care for your kids because of your health. A lawyer can help you prepare these documents - many of which are also available on the internet. By preparing well for the future, you can focus on living well today. Helen L. Coons, Ph.D., is a board certified clinical health psychologist and president of Women's Mental Health Associates. Dr. Coons specializes in working with women across the life span with early and advanced breast cancer; women "at risk" for breast and gynecological cancers; and family members coping with breast cancer. For more information, see www.womensmentalhealthassociates.com or call 215- 732-5590. Julia Rovinsky, M.S., is a doctoral student who will complete her doctorate in clinical psychology at Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine in July, 2010 where she has worked with individuals with chronic illness. Ms. Rovinsky has also worked for the past two years with women diagnosed with breast cancer and ovarian cancers and their partners.* HEALTH SERIES PART2
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